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Downton, Carson is waiting for you! (UPDATED WITH MUSIC)
February 17, 2013

I like making up new words to songs. Okay, I really like making up new words to songs. A few weeks ago, I got a bee in my bonnet about Downton Abbey and Petula Clark's "Downtown," so I procrastinated on a deadline and came up with a little something.

I also figured after the season three finale we could all use a few smiles and a song in our heart, so I give you this parody of Petula Clark's classic. Here is "Downton Abbey" as performed by the stunning Allison Lowe, produced and edited by the genius Vince Chao (both of The Damn Millionaires).

Play "Downton"

When you're an heir and life is handing you Moseley
You can always go, Downton
When you've got daughters, full of poise but no dowry
Seems to help I know, Downton

Just listen to the giggles as the Dowager gets witty
Linger in the bedrooms, where the chambermaids are pretty
How can you lose? The jewels are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares

And go
Downton, you will find mates when you're
Downton, no larger place for sure
Downton, Daisy is waiting for you


Don't hang around and let O'Brien confound you
There are Turkish bros, Downton
Maybe you know some little bedrooms to go
To where they shed their clothes, Downton

Just listen to the mewlings of a plaintive Edith Crawley
You'll be crying with her too before she gets too squally
single again
The waists are much tighter there
You can squander your savings, marry your heirs

And go
Downton, where all the ties are white
Downton, waiting for you tonight
Downton, they're gonna be uptight now


And you may find Thomas there to trick and undermine you
Someone who is just a arse and needs a heavy hand
To smack him a few so maybe we'll share the glee
We can turn on the TV, then put on some tea

And go
Downton, there will be Bates when you're
Downton, Hughes and the Patmore
Downton, Carson is waiting for you!
Downton, Downton, Downton, Downton

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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
Copyright © 2002-2013
Stephanie Vander Weide Lucianovic