NCookieAA: Round 1, Flight 2

June 23, 2014

TJ's Peppermint Joe Joe's Sandwich
Chips Ahoy, chewy
Keebler Frosted Animal Cookies
Christie's Pirate Cookies (oatmeal pb)
Graham Crackers
Newtons, Fig
Mallomars
Keebler Fudge Sticks
Nabisco Ginger Snaps
Pepperidge Farm Milanos, mint
Oreos, original
Newman's Own Ginger O's
Oreos, Double Stuff
Oreos, Uh Ohs
President's Choice Butter First Oatmeal Cookies
TimTams, choc cream
Keebler Rainbow Chips Deluxe
President's Choice Lemon Lucullans
TJ's Dark Chocolate Covered Peppermint Joe-Joes
Matt's Oatmeal Raisin

Wow, randomizer. I hate you. This is a nightmare. ...Well, not for my own voting, because I can eliminate most of these out of hand: I've never tried any Trader Joe's cookies, I hate raisins, and while I'll sample the occasional stunt Oreo for Revolting Snacks, they're not something we have in the house on the reg. I'd have to go Frosted Animal; Nabisco Ginger Snaps AND Newman's Own Ginger Os; Tim Tams; and the humble chewy Chips Ahoy, just because Dirk loves them and we always have a tray around the house.

As for what gets through, I have no damn idea, but I think we can probably wave original Oreos and one of these TJ's through based on the fervor of the nomination round, along with Mallomars (probably only here on a technicality, but extremely popular) and Fig Newtons. But what's the fifth? Mint Milanos? Maybe. Fudge Sticks? Maybe. My prediction: Double Stuf, or good old reliable (if crappy) Chips Ahoy. -- Sarah D. Bunting

*****

Okay, this is not the time to get into the chewy/soft-baked debate. NOT THE TIME.

Fig Newtons? Ramona Quimby said they were filled with worms and even though I was old enough to know better then and today, I still don't disagree.

Oreo's original? They're fighting it out with Double Stuffs in the finals, so we can move along.

Pep Farm Mint Milanos? Remind me of a horrible ex, so moving along.

Keebler Fudge Sticks were another opportunity for amateur cookie dissection and I adore them and I don't know what I've been doing the last 20 years of my life not eating them.

Mallomars. So, I freaking LOVE these cookies. I don't know if they are better or worse or the lovely same as Pinwheels but I don't care. I have time to compare and they SHOULD move through because they are chocolate and cookie and marshmallow that has been fluffed more than a porn star. Eat them eat them now.

If you haven't had Trader Joe's Peppermint Joe Joe's with ACTUAL CANDY CANES CRUSHED INTO THE FILLING? You haven't ever eaten a cookie in your life. Shh. Just -- SHHHT! No, NO, shut up, because you haven't. (Dr. Mathra would feel the same about the dark chocolate covered peppermint Joe Joe's but between you and me, I think the couverture is overkill.)

Those are my feelings. My predictions are: Oreo's, Oreo Double Stuffs, Pep Farm Mint Milano's of a horrible ex, Fig Newtons, and Chips Ahoy Chewy. --Stephanie V.W. Lucianovic

GO VOTE!